steve told me i have been holding david's hand too tightly. i need to hold onto him more loosely and give him less support. he is walking great and really just needs a hand to guide him and maybe catch him if he starts to stumble. i am so used to holding his wrist tightly to make sure he stays balanced and to help him along. isn't this the hardest thing...knowing when to let go just a little?
24 comments:
Ahhhhh...isn't it hard. I almost bring myself to tears when I wonder...will this be the last little morning snuggle (my baby is 11) and when I need to take a step back...
I just blogged about that this morning...my youngest started real school and although I know it is just the beginning of a whole lot of letting go it doesn't make it any easier!!!
yes, it is. i cannot believe the amazing progress david is making!
It is hard to lossen that grip. I would agree!
He is so sweet. You can see it in his eyes. May your family continue to be blessed
Lisa, can i ask you some more questions about david? I'm so interested in your little guy!
I've been reading a lot of the other CdLS blogs and i guess i never realized the varying "degrees" of the syndrome. One girl, who was 11, had just become potty-trained. Do you think this is something in d's future? Do you know if he will be able to talk or be more independent with age, or is it just too hard to tell? It seems like he is making great progress - we're all very proud of him. :)
It is the hardest thing to let go, whether it is physically or mentally. I've been accused of baby-ing my 8 y/o too much.
We just let Sedona go to preschool, so this is right where we are, too. Not easy, but essential. Funny how Daddies are courageous in suggesting letting go where we mommies might wait.
Letting go is very hard. WE have a first day of preschool tomorrow and I asked my husband to go into work late tomorrow for support. I don't want to cry and then make my son think that preschool is a bad thing.
I'm still learning.
i love this.
it IS hard to let go. =(
Thanks for your sweet comments--you are so encouraging!
Lisa, to answer your questions...I hope David will be potty trained one day. We really try to encourage him forward, while accepting that his progress happens more slowly. I don't expect him to speak verbally, as kids with the syndrome usually don't have more than a couple words.
Thanks for your interest in David!
"To love someone is to let go" that's my device in all kind of love. Just think about it...
Yes Lisa,
It is hard to let go, esp when we have our kiddo's with extra challenges. We are trained (as mommies who are with them all of the time) to hold on tight to keep them safe. It is nice that Steve could recognize that it is time and give you the nudge, I am sure that he only had the best of intentions for the both of you :)
Peace to you~
(and holding on a little gentler, thank you!)
beth in colorado
So true, Lisa. Tonight my four year old asked me to rock her before she went to bed....something I haven't done since I don't remember when. I rocked and we talked....and I treasured the moment because I don't know how much longer and she won't want to do these kinds of things with me anymore. Today was the first day of (pre)school. It is so hard to let go sometimes when we would like to keep them young just a bit longer......
Sara
oh lisa!! i love this post and i can only imagine how tough it is to let go of the little guy!!
lots of hugs your way!
...not only knowing when to let go just a little is hard - actually making ourselves DO it can be a heartwrenching leap of faith sometimes...what a beautiful post right here at the beginning of a new school year, which finds all of us checking the tightness of our "grips"! I hope you are going to let us know how things are transpiring with David getting exactly what he needs at school...and that his "team" of educators and therapists is just as aware as you and Steve of "when to guide him and maybe catch him if he starts to stumble"...
I thought the same today Lisa, when I couldn't help myself but peek at my Joe during lunch recess. My mind tells me I need to let go but my heart just can't. At least not today.
Anne
This is exactly my Jenelle! If I hold her hand too tightly, or when people like to hold her arm and such, she doesn't walk as well. But if you let her hold your finger... just watch her go!
Lisa,
As a first time mother, even though she is 3, I do not know if I will ever let go. They say as you have more it gets easier....but I just don't know. I can not imagine NOT holding on tight, no matter how many children I have. As my cousin said when she lost her oldest son just recently, "It doesn't matter if they are six foot two or two foot six, they will always be your babies". He was a beautiful 25 year old man....God bless him. They say having children is like haveing your heart walk around outside of your body for the rest of your life.....I feel it every day! Take care! Hold on to those "hearts"!
Warmly,
Leslie G.
that is the hardest, isn't it? especially when it's so literal a metaphor.
the other day, first day of school and 1st taekwando lesson since early summer, and my son with aspergers had 2 new tkd teachers. i didn't have a chance to speak with them about him, per usual, and guess what - he did fine. there was almost no way to differentiate him from anyone else in the class. i was worried, then amazed and proud.
isn't it wonderful when we give them a chance to succeed on their own and they do?
It is hard letting go through their whole lives. Hard watching them fall when they are learning to walk, hard watching them begin school, hard watching them walk into middle school and high school and most recently, hard watching my 16 year old drive out of the driveway (with no adult in the car with him) No matter what form it is always hard letting go. I completely understand!
hmmm, wise words from a wise mother. It is soo challenging when to loosen the grip. The most comforting thing I remember when God reminds me to losen up is that HE NEVER losens His grip on His children. So while we, mothers and parents are called to losen the grip we can rest assured that the God of the universe's grip remains the same, tight, not ever losening!!!
It is harder for the mother than the child. I think all of us have to stop ourselves from holding on too tightly.
Isn't it beautiful when they grow away from us even if it is hard?
Hey, that is so neat that he's walking so well that you can start to let go a bit!
Faye,
fayejh@gmail.com
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